5 rules for building a healthy relationship with your phone


For many of us, smartphones have become an integral part of life. Wherever you are, your phone will always be there. Some even take it in the shower.

There are actions that you can take in order to weaken your attachment to this technological appendage of everyday life. For example, you can remove some applications or disable notifications in them. Undoubtedly, such methods are extremely effective in reducing the attractiveness of your phone and the frequency of its use. But, first, it will only slightly reduce your dependence on the phone; and secondly, there is a chance that you will not be long enough, and after two days you will want to restore all deleted applications or check new messages, ignoring the absence of notifications.

Completely get rid of dependence on your phone, most likely, will not succeed. Yes, and it makes no sense: most of the opportunities that the gadget provides us are really comfortable and designed to simplify many aspects of our life. Another question is to deprive the smartphone at least part of the power it has over you, and push it out of the center of your life. The following 5 simple tips will help you build the most appropriate relationship with your phone and put it on the list of priorities in the proper place somewhere between the working computer and the microwave.

1. Do not start your day with the phone.

Many people, waking up in the morning, the first thing they do is browse the contents of the screen of their smartphone. The glow of the display becomes for them a substitute for the morning sunrise. In the first minutes after waking up, immersion in the phone provokes the production of dopamine, which allows you to feel a slight vigor and a desire to get out of bed. But subordinating the activity of your brain to a smartphone in the first minutes of the day, you force it to look for a re-excitation during the entire remaining time.

If you want to set yourself up for important things during the day and not be distracted, try not to look at your phone for at least the first 15 minutes after waking up. And better still longer. For this reason, many psychologists do not recommend using your phone as an alarm clock. After all, then you will inevitably look at his screen, barely opening his eyes.

2. Do not use the phone on the road

This situation is probably familiar to you: you check the phone, waiting for a green light or standing in line at the store; some even manage to look at the screen, while in motion or driving a car.

Just leave the phone at home, if, for example, you go out to the store or gym for a while. In case you are going or going to work, place the handset away from your hands (in a briefcase, bag, backpack). You can argue, because at this time you can send an important message on work. But let’s be honest. How often do you try to solve a problem on the road? And how productive will your activity be at this moment? In most of these cases, the person begins to act upon arrival at work.

3. Keep your phone in your pocket while eating or talking

Studies show that even the presence of a switched on phone nearby makes it difficult for people to communicate. Subconsciously concerned that the conversation will be interrupted by a call, they are forced to stick to smaller topics. Therefore, do not put the phone on the table during a meal or do not hold it in your hand when talking to another person. Do not forget that the pockets on your clothes are not only for beauty. Like your bag. There and hold the phone at the moment while doing other things.

4. Take your phone out of your sight while doing important things.

In one study on food consumption, nutritionists found that a person eats more sweets if they are in a transparent jar on the table; slightly less if the bank is not transparent, and even less if the candies are placed in a closed jar, which is located six meters from a person. The result of this study confirms a simple intuitive thought: the more accessible an object is to you, the more you will think about it.

In the case of a modern person, smartphones act as the same candy. Even if the phone is in sleep mode, but is located in your field of vision, you will not leave the desire to check it. In this case, you may not be aware of this desire, but your brain will give the appropriate impulses. In the end, your willpower will be erased, you will give up and, without even noticing it, you will appear with the phone in your hand, checking the list of received messages in all messengers in turn.

To prevent this and not to provoke yourself, keep the phone out of your sight when you work, read or watch TV. When it is hidden from sight, there will be no desire to check it. And remember: the farther the better. Therefore, if it is possible to leave the phone in another room during an important business, it will be the best option.

5. Do not take the phone to bed when you go to bed

American researchers found that 71% of their fellow citizens (and 90% among 18–29-year-olds) sleep with their smartphones or keep them at night in bed. Probably, you have heard more than once how harmful a phone is for sleeping with its light emission and constant notifications. If you have not heard, then you can read about it here. But, in addition to the factors interfering with sleep, the psychological element of dependence is also important. It’s bad if you don’t allow your daily business to leave you even in your own bed and think about them before you fall asleep.

Let your conversation with the phone during the day ends at least on the threshold of your bedroom. It is extremely undesirable to go to bed with him, and it is better to leave him in another room altogether. Instead, take a paper book to bed better: it will be much easier to fall asleep with it. And when you wake up in the morning and do not find a phone near you, you will get rid of the temptation to look at its screen and avoid the problem we wrote about in the first paragraph.


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